What the ----?, Sheena12

This might win the WTF moment of the year

 Here is the text of the post:

Honestly, I want NO attachment to the family of origin.  None.  I want to adopt children who are ready to move on.  In other words I do not want to visit siblings, former moms, dads, grandparents.  None of it.  I wasn’t a closed adoption, which is what I have now.

How would I know?  There are visits before the adoption becomes permanent.  Often on the photos listing it will say – Stephen desires to visit his birth brother and grandmother- prospective parents should be open to this.  We are not open to it

I think that all of this catering to people who have screwed up  is KEPING KIDS FROM BEING ADOPTED!

It’s not fashionable to say this but I am not interested in this AT ALL!  Nor is my husband.  If a child has delusions of being reunited from a parent from whom she was severed legally, that child does not need me

They need therapy and I think the whole US social service system needs a reality check.  THIS is why people such as myself go abroad.

We do not want to share our children or permit potentially unsafe people into our lives.

Look, I do not mean to sound cold, but why is it always the adoptive parent who needs to be open to this or that accommodation?  We mostly turned to adoption because we could not have a child a second or a third child.

We did not do it as a charity thing.  We are regular families who want to be a certain size and there are children out there who need adoptive parents.

To create a fantasy world for a prospective child, or to accommodate a teenager who has given birth out of wedlock is wrong and counter productive

How do I put this- 

Are you freakin' kidding me? 

What a mess of selfish, arrogant, entitled, privileged, (and when you read all 9 pages of the original source, racist and class-ist) garbage. 

I have never seen such a blatant disregard for a child in my life. 

To say they need therapy because they want attachment to their birth family. 

To assume that their new family is the end all be all that just erases everything that came before. 

And then to complain that the people who object to what you wrote are anti- adoption. 

They aren't anti-adoption, they are anti- letting-people-like-you-who-believe-this-shit adopt.

And as an adoptive parent- I agree with them. 
Truthfully you make me "anti-adoption" 

Although I do agree with you that the social service system needs a reality check- after all someone approved you.

And if "catering" to their first families- you know the people whose child you are raising- if catering to them means that more children are not adopted by people like you- well I'm not sure that's a bad thing.

Children are not an etch-a-sketch that you get to shake and just start over with when they come to you. 

They are part of their first family and no matter how hard you try to stop it or change it- they will always be part of that family. 

They get to decide what that relationship will entail- not you. 

I have said it before-

Adoptees have two sets of parents and two families.

If you can't accept that- Don't adopt.