What is it About the Grocery Store

that leads to intimate and personal conversations about adoption?

Many adoptive parents (at least those with "conspicuous" families) report that some of the worst, most intrusive comments from strangers happen at the grocery store. I luckily have not had too many bad experiences- one of the worst was someone (on a Sunday morning no less) asking me if I ran a preschool- and being conspicuous means the staff at the deli counter remembers my kids so they get spoiled with samples.

Apparently though the desire to talk about adoption in the grocery store is not just an urge strangers feel...

The scene:

A is walking next to the cart, K is in the cart (the other kids are at home which is why any conversation was able to take place at all)

Me:

Choose which kind of cereal you want and put it in the cart

K:

(doesn't actually have a speaking part but promptly reaches in to grab the aforementioned cereal intending to throw it out of the cart)

Me: Please don't take things out of the cart (while grabbing the box as it is hurled to the ground)

A: You don't have to listen to her K, she not your real mom

Me:

Excuse me, but you better believe I am her real mom- Your real mom is the one who takes care of you when you are sick, who hugs you when you feel bad and who will ground you if you tell your sister again that I am not her real mom. Now do you mean that she also had a birth mom too?

A:

Yeah, what happened to her birthmom?

Me:

That's a private story that I don't want to discuss in the cereal aisle of the grocery store

A:

Why not?

Me:

It's your sister's private story that we will not be sharing with other people, especially in the grocery store

A:

But... (and he went on to ask some other pointed questions that I will not relay in order to keep said private story ACTUALLY private)

Me:

We are done talking about this in the store. We can talk more at home if you want.

A:

Can I get some fruit snacks?